Here I come with my first test result!

Bahasa Malaysia - 74%
Bahasa Inggeris - 70%
Mathematics - 70%
Additional Mathematics - 37%
Biology - 40%
Chemistry - 49%
Physics - 48%
Pendidikan Islam - 67%
History - 64%
English for Science and Technology - 53%

Honestly, with these result, I better go die! Such a dumbass I am.

There's this handsome guy.

Last week was the most worst week for me. I cried a lot because of missing my grandpa. But I know I shouldn't be worried about him up there because God will takes a very good care of him right. I miss you a lot!
I received a message from a guy on Facebook, let me call him Mr. J! I don't know why I can be very friendly towards a stranger like him as I never acted like that before, I ignore boys' chat every time. He wasn't like "Hai, boleh berkenalan?" but he asked me: Do you know that rock band, We Are The Crowd? The vocalist and you look alike!
I said I don't know that band, so he gave me a link which linked to the picture of that female vocalist on Facebook. I got up there and I was thinking, we aren't look alike at all. And then again, are you serious? Haha. Then we chatted for some times and at the end of our conversations, he asked for my phone number. And I was like jual mahal hahahahaha. After that he was like gave up then we off because the time showed 12am something and I got very sleepy at that time.
Back to the story. I received a message from him on Facebook a week ago after that night. He asked my phone number again. That was the day where my grandpa just passed away. And that was the day where the internet line was so retarded! To open that Mr. J's message took a very long time on that night. Once it opened, I just gave him my phone number because I was thinking, why not? Right peeps? I know right. Haha. After 20 minutes something, he messaged me! I was so glad because I'm not lonely again, I finally have a friend to chat with! So our friendship goes well until this day.
He is so handsome and I bet every girl want him so bad. One thing about him that really caught my eyes is that he is very nice. Some says he has a playboy-looking. I noticed that he never date a girl before this but I'm not that sure. Yeah, I think he has a playboy-looking. Just look at him, he's so handsome, no wonder bah. He always find me everyday and I am so happy being with him. He doesn't stop finding me, what is that means? Haha. Okay, this life isn't mine. I will let everything happens if it wants to, I'm not the one who control this universe. If we both have that faith, sure everything will be okay, we will further our relationship. I won't reject because he's that perfect. I won't let go of a perfect guy that is volunteer to come and knocked my heart. But if we don't have that faith, I'll be fine too.

I didn't put much hope anyway, as long as he always make me smile and that I can smile again like I used to be at the past.

I miss you.

I am that childish granddaughter he ever had in this world. I can only get to meet him once in a year, that is when the Hari Raya Aidilfitri is around the corner. I still remember the time when I was just a little. He taught me how to made a moneybox using an old fine coconut. He advised me to have the saving-money habits all the time. Whenever I went there, I always ask him to get a coconut for me to have the water inside of that coconut. I love to drink that even until now. He loves to spend his money to buy firecrackers for me because he knows I love those thing. Time passes that fast isn't it? He's now gone, leaving us this early morning. That bad news shocked me a lot. I don't wanna cry in front of my family. But when I get inside the bathroom, I'm like breathless. I can't stop myself from crying, so I just sit in that bathroom and cried. I haven't meet my dad today because he had been there at Beaufort a few days ago. I hope my dad will be strong enough to face the situation. I can't wait to see my atok again. I had visited him yesterday and got back home last night. I couldn't believe that I need to go back there again just to see him leaving us.

All those memories we had, I will keep that in my heart forever.

My so-far school days.

Hello I'm back but with a short post to show that I'm still alive haha.
I'm so exhausted. I feel boring everyday with books books books. Plus, I have the marching practice every evening. Now my face became darken than before but of course I still look cute haha joking. Then I'll be very busy after the Chinese New Year's Holidays. I need to attend tuition classes. It torturing me but I don't mind because what I need to focus is just my SPM. No more wasting time, ughh.
So far school threated me much better than last year, I feel very satisfied with all the teachers and also on what they had taught. Chinese New Year plans? I got some. My friends and I planning to go to our Chinese friends' house. But my mom told me that we will go to Beaufort visiting my aunt's family there and of course we will celebrate the day with them. If I've been given the choice to choose between my friends and my family, I would really love to go with my friends. But somehow I still haven't got an idea now. But still it doesn't really a big deal, it just the same thing. Yet friends are much awesome right? I know right.
Talked about today's school. I got my marching practice this evening so I stayed with my best friends before the practice begins. We went to the canteen outside the school area and ate our lunch. After staying there for almost 1 hour, we went back to school. I was so surprised, I was so shocked!
Okay I don't feel like wanna share about that here, haha! I did nothing about that. I just smiled.

First secret of 2012.

Hey everyone. I’ve been very busy lately with my school stuffs and I just don’t have any chance to get myself on the internet. Biasalah kan, no internet service at school time, my dad said that to us. So, maafkan Datin yer? Hahahahaha.

Actually there’s a thing I wanna share here. I know some of the readers will get bored very quickly but I appreciate if there’s some of the readers that are willing to hear this.

Last year when I was in Form 4, I suddenly saw this guy. He shocked me so much that I probably could run towards him. I don’t know his name and I don’t know where he was studying before he came to the school of mine. He was in Form 6, the first year students of Form 6 actually. I think he was in the science class. To make this simple for me to explain, I will just call him Mr. Twins.

Mr. Twins comes to school every day with his neat-looking, he wears extra T-shirt in his school uniform, it was the same T-shirt he wears most of the time which is in blue colour. He has a charming eyes and his look attracted me. He has a nerd-looking mainly on his hair, but he looks so fine for me. Sometimes I really hope that I can touch his hair. He is so handsome and when we passed by each other, I can’t stop looking at him and I will turn my head back to look the way he walks by. He looks skinny but actually he is taller than me. I love the way he walk. One day, my best friend and I went to the toilet located near his class which is at the second floor. When we were walking on the stairs, he and his friends were walking down. So we passed by each other and I can’t stop staring at him. My best friend said he can speaks Chinese. I can’t stop smiling when I saw him.

I called him Mr. Twins because when I saw him, he reminds me of someone. Someone which I really dear, someone which I really love. Both of them have the same eyes, hair, ears, mouth and face. They have the same good-looking. Both of them could speaks Chinese. I smiled every time I saw Mr. Twins, but tears sometimes come along with me. There is a time I really wanna get to know him more, and maybe we can be friend. But I don’t do that because I really don’t know him. I don’t even know his name, I don’t know even a thing about that guy. I feel like I wanna hug him even though we do not know each other. I really have a huge desire to hug him and ask him to not leave me anymore. I wanna tell Mr. Twins that I miss him so much. I miss everything and I miss playing with his hair. I miss playing with him. I have those feelings towards him. But whatever it is, he was just a stranger that I called Mr. Twins. Lots of questions attacked me. WHY MR. TWINS LOOKS JUST LIKE HIM? If I’ve been given a last chance that come only once in a lifetime, I would choose to hug Mr. Twins. Because the guy that I love so much, maybe he might not be here for me anymore. It’s the only medicine for the pain I have now. After that I will let go and then next will be God’s decision. But like I said just now, he was just a stranger that I called Mr. Twins. Thanks to God for giving that guy. I really don’t know him, but he made my day. Seeing him every day in a far distance, I think that could cure my empty heart. Thanks, stranger.

Wish you guys a great day ahead. Till then.

Happy born day to me!

Happy sweet 16 to myself! Finally, I'm officially 16. Bohoooo.
I wanna thank my family for kindly celebrated this blessed day of mine, even though the celebration was just simple, but I feel grateful anyway. And those who kindly wished me for this day, thanks you guys, hehehehe.
I'm finally 16! And that means I need to be mature and think like a 16 mature teenage. Kan? Because celebrating birthday every years means that you're getting old by year. So, bila makin tua, sikap pun mesti makin matang kan? Naa, no more wasting time after this I swear, my aim for now is just to get straight A's on my SPM. I won't put much hope on that, the confidence is enough, and just the efforts that count. Kan?
I just wish to be a good person, a good daughter to my beloved parents, a good sister to my brothers, a good Muslim in the future and a good best friend to my three darling. And you know what, they were the earlier that wished me today! I feel so happy! Except for Audrey. I thought she had forgotten and I feel sad at the beginning of this day. But suddenly she came with a message just now, and wished me! She said she wanna be the last person to wish me. I cried because it really touched me inside. Thanks to three of you!

I love you guys, bye! Till then.

Rest in peace my dear friend.

I was so shocked to heard that one of my schoolmate had passed away yesterday. I went for a walk at Facebook yesterday and almost everyone posted about his death. I know all of his buddies feel extremely upset about the news. Although I didn't really know him, but losing one of my schoolmate make me sad. I always saw him around the school. I know that he is a good person and a good buddy to all his gang. Everyone is talking about how nice he is towards everyone and he is a guy who always treat girls nicely. I cannot join my friends to visit him for the last time, but I will always pray for him. He will always be in everyone's heart. May God place him among the believers.

There are few things absolutely certain in life, but death is one of them. Everyone has a birth date and everyone will have a death date. Knowing that our loved one is gone, it teach us to be strong in life because death is one of our life challenges arranged by Him. We should be prepared in whatever conditions in life. Love yourself. Love those who are closest to you. And, if your can, love as many people as you can. And live a loving life. Take loving actions. For it is the actions you take - not simply you thoughts about people - that are likely to be your last thoughts as the life that you are leaves its worn out shell to return home from when it came.

Rest in peace Dreitzmer. We love you! And will going to miss you always.

What a day!

First of all you guys need to know is, today is a very disappointing day for me. Last night was the same as today too I'm sure. I really really feel disappointed.
In this fast paced world, we hardly see each other. We spent our time dealing with machines, computers and use gadgets more often than in the past. However, our perspective on life has changed as well. Friendship has become more important. And we really treasure our friends. We look forward to have great time with them and we count our lucky stars when we're blessed with good friends who're there for us in times of need.
How about love then? Yes, its popular notion that "love begins with friendship". A relationship with between a man and a woman can evolve and bloom into love that bounds them forever. But today I would like to know where's the line between friends and lover? Which relationship is stronger?
And this is my opinions.
Our friends are there all the time. They know our weakness and strengths and they don't judge us for lame reasons. They correct us if we're wrong, motivates us, cheer us when we're down and appreciates our company genuinely. Love comes and goes, but friendship lasts forever! It is said that "the poorest man on earth is the one without friends".
So will you agree if I say that friendship is stronger than love?
Sometimes, friendship is stronger than love. I finally realize the meaning of this. Sometimes, friendship is just stronger than the love you feel towards a person. Sometimes friendship lasts longer than a relationship. Sometimes, friendship is just on a higher level than love. You can tell a best friend anything and they’ll listen and help you out. But sometimes you can’t tell a person you like about the same situation. There are just some things that you feel more comfortable talking to a close friend than a person who you should actually feel like telling everything too. I understand this.
Best friends. It's hard to find them in this harsh world I'm telling you. They are the best in life. I have my own best friends and I love them so much. They have been part of my life and they had taught me a lot, I learned lessons and I learned that love isn't very important and stronger as friendship. Love comes and goes. You will know that when you choose your love one instead of your best friends, you will feel regret. Once your love is gone, you will notice that what you really need at that dark time was just your friends. Appreciate your best friends, they are everything. Unless if you disagree about those statement I've made, you can just get the hell out of here and fuck yourself.

Have a bless everyone, will update more soon!