It was so sad that I couldn't meet him for this whole week. Probably for the next week either. I'm done crying with pillows beside me. Sometimes, I wanted to do crazy things. I did think of wanna meet some of my boy friends to make him jealous to death. But "think before act" has been my guider since a long time ago. It was the dumbest thing to be done, I won't try them ever. I miss him a lot that I didn't want to tell him, because I always know the response won't make my day. He seems okay for everything that I don't. I was trying and keep trying until now, how can I make it okay for myself. I can't. But seeing my other best friends being tougher than me, as they are going through even worse experiences than me, I know I can develop well on this. I think I just need time. Even though crying at night was a tiring, but seems like it helped me a lot on expressing things, I don't care at all.
I always miss you.
I'm done throwing some shits out of me.
